Censorship at the KivaFriends Forum

[Guest]

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[Dottie b]

Another technique I have seen used effectively in other internet places is disemvoweling of comments which are particularly rude or nasty.  -Kerry-

nvr hrd f dsmvwlng. s t lk ths? ntrsting pprch - mks t knd f a gme!

Dottie B

[waywardcats]

nvr hrd f dsmvwlng. s t lk ths? ntrsting pprch - mks t knd f a gme!

Dottie B

xctly lk tht Dtt!  Hw mch fn cld n hv wth ths tchnq?   

[Dottie b]

Ya know, I'd been away from the forum for several weeks, and when I saw the title of this thread in the index, I assumed it was about the Chat not printing certain words! We had a lot of fun with that one evening several months ago, and I asked Peter if that was his idea. He was surprised and said it was the software and re-set, but there were still words that didn't print. I forget now which ones they were. Sometime when you're bored, give it a try. . . .

Dottie B

[Dottie b]

In order for a "friend" to also be a moderator, they should be given a separate persona as moderator, with it being their own choice as to how much they divulge of their identities. 

Based on experience in other discussion groups, I would not want to be in another one with an anonymous moderator.  But I guess the upside is, I could be a bit more blunt with an anonymous moderator than with someone I know as a friend! :-)

Dottie B

[mejane]

Early in my nursing career I became aware of publications in my professional journals asking the question “why do nurses eat their young?”  It referred to how more experienced personnel would guard their knowledge/experience while criticizing newer staff.  It explored the competitiveness of a mostly female profession and rebuked those who were unwilling to mentor the “upcoming generation.”  It also addressed the “power struggle” issues and the wanting “to be always right.”

Henry was a mentor to me when I was new.  We bonded as friends early on.  We are more alike than we are different.  I recognized him as the brother I never got the chance to have.  I was totally unprepared for how his leaving was going to make me feel.  It is going to be a very long time before I get over this.

While I agree that we have many wonderful people participating in the forum I have asked myself for 3 days whether I wanted to continue to come here.  If Kiva Friends "eats its young" is it really friends?

None of what I have said is meant to be hurtful.  However, I do feel we need to look introspectively at ourselves (myself included).  I think we also need to remember that our “rights” stop where the rights of others start.  Glenn, for being the “new kid” you certainly bring a lot of sage wisdom with you.  You have put so much into perspective.  Thank you.

Jane

[Peter S]

. . . We had a lot of fun with that one evening several months ago, and I asked Peter if that was his idea. He was surprised and said it was the software and re-set, but there were still words that didn't print. I forget now which ones they were. Sometime when you're bored, give it a try. . . .

Dottie B

You've been away so long Dottie... I would indeed have been very surprised to have been asked that, and I expect Joe was as well.  Yes, the chat software still censors words like #&@%& and #&@%&, and even pretty innocuous words like #&@%& and #&@%& as well.

-----

As for the more serious issues raised in and by this thread. There's been so much written here that is good and insightful, that I don't have anything much to add.  Like Jane, I will single out Glenn's contribution a page or two back --  maybe the fact that Glenn is new to this forum and is not perhaps as caught up in the personalities involved, makes his dispassionate advice (backed up by experience) all the more valuable.

About Henry's reaction to what's happened... I think Richard got it exactly right early on when he said

Henry - Good! 

Moderator job - Tough! 

This topic - About the job, not the guy. 

Henry probably just didn't see it that way -- about it being about the job, not the guy -- and that's a matter of great regret to me, as it is to every one of us.  Like he said, he was just trying to do his best in what was a very stressful situation.  Caught between a rock and a hard place...

I hope, despite the present signs to the contrary, that he'll be back one day, helping once again in his inimitable way to make this place what it is.

P

[Sherri]

Mejane (and everyone else who's upset at recent events)-

I really hope you don't leave over this. I think we're getting so mired in this conversation that we are forgetting what's important, and what this forum is really about, and what it's like to 'be' here.

Yes, a thread degenerated in an inappropriate direction. It was removed by a moderator- as it should be. Some people were angry/indignant and I assume Henry got some flack for his moderation decision. These things happen on ALL forums - trust me. It is unfortunate, but not shocking.

But.... let's all sit back for a moment and remember what this forum represents. Remember the good that we have done such as Florence's school fund, the recent wheelchair drive, and the currently underway quilt project.

Remember all the Kiva 'newbies' who have wandered in here with questions and concerns and who have received warm welcomes, and intelligent and prompt answers to their questions. Remember the power of united voices as we bring collective concerns to Kiva about things like loans for Bear Gall, privacy concerns and technical glitches - acting as a vocal and informed voice between the Kiva lender community and the Kiva staff.

Look around the forum at all the little 'goodies' people have made to support their love of Kiva - banners, graphics, programs, spreadsheets, affiliate programs and more. Threads for learning about the world and the countries in it.

People - this recent issue is merely a tiny hic-up in a fantastic and inspiring community we have all built together - under the often thankless and tough, direction and care of Joe, and the mod team.

To everyone, especially Joe, Diane and Henry (if he's lurking) - let's always keep foremost in our minds the knowledge of the bright jewel that is KivaFriends- and refuse to allow one or two 'runaway' threads to get us down. We are much better than that - and a quick browse around this site proves it.

I hope that no one leaves KF because of this (relatively) minor incident, and I especially hope that Henry returns after a brief leave.

And, let's take this opportunity to renew our resolve to keep threads respectful, thank our mods and Joe more often, and continue in the spirit of the Kiva Family that we've created.

[Dottie b]

Right, Peter, it was Joe I spoke with! (Senior moment? Brain fart? Maybe I was just thinking of you!) <g>

Dottie B

[RichardF]

Just in case you haven't noticed this (Henry tried to slip it in without much of anyone noticing it.  ) I'm quoting this musing in its entirety.

I appreciate more than you know every wish that I stay here with KF.  KF is a great place full of very interesting, fun, and good people.  It's hard to leave!   I also thought yesterday a post from me might be OK.  I tried to post something in here but just kept rambling and rambling.  However, if anyone is feeling any pain, please don't - none is warranted.

Yes, my decision to leave was made out of pain, I reacted while in pain, however, the actual thoughts of cutting back on KF was a long time coming.  It was not the moderator position -that part was actually pretty easy...hmmmm..... OK, easy about 99.9% of the time.  Then that little 0.1% really is hard to deal with.  As a moderator and someone who loves KF's so much the thought of banning someone ..  UGHHHHH ...  who am I to take away something that can mean so much to someone.  Now that's tough, and looking at the list of who's been banned... no one has been banned for any reason other than spamming or an alternate use of the forum as far as I can see. That says a lot for the people who are here.

OK..... I'm rambling again....going to try to focus! 

Here are the things that are making me cut back on KF.

1.  I got hurt, took the recent post personal, I was doing OK taking it when it was just me - but then I turned into a puddle when I spoke with Diane and she was feeling some of the 'side affects' of this.  I acted like a child to one KF in a PM and this one action of mine is why I ran.  I felt so disgusted with myself and my action - it was more of a self imposed (see photo below) .

2.  For several weeks now, I've been aware of how much of my time was going to KF.  Not because of any responsibility to the Site, but because of - it's a great place to avoid responsibility.  How long ago did I start the latest remodel on one of the rooms in my house (Janes room!   )  that is still not completed - it's down to a little bit of sheetrock work, and then painting.  Instead of taking care of that - I would run here.  That's just one example of how I would ignore things and use KF as a place to forget about them. 

3.  About 10 days ago I was at my local library swapping books and audio books and I decided to take a walk around the park adjacent to the building.  When I was around the lake, I noticed an elderly man fishing in a pond.  This pond while from a distance is attractive, a close up view will show you the cans, bottles, and trash along with the filth that is part of it.  You know I'm nosey!  and without 'D' around to keep me in-line, I'm liable to do anything.  I walked up to this man and asked....  "are you catching to release, or catching to eat"  ... he kind of chuckled and said, "well I ain't catching nuttin today, but when I do it will be supper"  we talked a bit about the amount of food his family has, the cost of gas killing him, the services this city has, etc, etc.   Eye's clear, back straight - this was a good man, who was fishing for food in what you or I would call a cess pool.    This haunted me - set me on the 'thought process' of what or how can I do something for this guy...and the others in his situation locally.  I'm still working on 'what can I do' part.

  OK, so again, if it's more then 3 lines of text...  i typically can't write it!   

so... 

I'm OK!
It's a break until I can be OK with myself.
I will pop in to see what my friends are doing
it wasn't you or you or you.....


but I really came close to posting this video....  and will, just because how can this lady not make any of us smile!!!



thank you for the PM's the Emails and post here.  They were very much appreciated. 

The one who really is going to be in pain over my cutting back on KF is "D" who said....  "Great, another 3 hours of you each day!!!" 

Huggers to everyone of you.

Now...in Henry Fashion...... I'm back to......   

[Sengbe Pieh]

I see you beat me to it Richard!   

Original is in the "Anything Goes" thread:  http://www.kivafriends.org/index.php/topic,458.2330.html